Silly Life.

I woke up suddenly this morning after a horrible dream. It was one of those situations I had already been in but my mind wanted to relive it so that I could change my reaction and feel better about the outcome. It happens a lot. Most the time I do end up feeling better about something that happened 2 (or so) years ago. However, occasionally I'll wake up in a panic with the situation left open and without a chance to fix things or stand up for myself. Today was one of those occasions. I was hot and sweaty, my mind was racing, and I was ticked. Ready to take a stand, I sat up abruptly. Before I had a chance to make a good point, I found that I was tangled in my turquoise bedspread, reminding me that I was home, where I belong, and not far from my Colby.
  It was just a dream, and nothing but. I was shocked, it felt so real. The background, the emotions, the room, the smell. It was real, I swear it. But not really.
  I've never loved that bedspread the way I did this morning.
 I rolled over, and hugged Colby tight, tight enough to wake him up. He opened his eyes long enough to find my forehead and kiss it before he fell back asleep.
As I said my prayers in the shower, standing up, with shampoo in my hair - The tears rolled down my face, they were just slightly hotter than the water on my back. I cried and cried. I was so grateful for that very moment I had to converse with the Lord. Sometimes life catches up with me - too too often - and I forget to take that moment every day to tell him Thank You.
Sadly, it's in the shower 70% of the time. I like to think of it like this. Only I can hear me but I don't have to whisper, I have my routine down pat so it takes zero concentration to shave *Unless it's a new razor :) and It's something I do every day, without fail.
I thanked him for giving me this much needed hot shower and for letting the neighbors sleep in so they didn't flush the toilet on me. I thanked him for my job and the love I have for both Pharmacies. I thanked him for the sweet spirit that dwells in our home. I thanked him for the opportunity that we have to send Colby to an LDS school and for the guidance he receives there. I thanked him for blogs and for letting me keep up with The Peterson's. I thanked him for the love that he has for me. I thanked him for a Mom that is so far past amazing, there isn't a word good enough to describe her. I said Thank You for the amazing siblings that I've always had and for the few that have joined our family through marriage who are truly supposed to be apart of us. I thanked him for my trials and for blessing me with Colby on such short notice. I thanked him for not giving up on me when I needed him the most. I thanked him for blessing Colby with an incredible amount of strength and being able to endure my craziness.
  I told him I was grateful for the opportunity to be A daughter of God and to have this knowledge.
I started to finish but then I stopped and smiled.
        I thanked him for letting me be Mrs. Carter and for letting me be apart of something so amazing.
I finished this prayer with a mile wide smile.
  Life is so good to me.
I love my reality.

Those smiles, are pretty much permanent.